Condoms - One size fits all - a rant

Selasa, 01 Juli 2008

For years I truly hated the damn things.
They really were uncomfortable and an incredible turn-off.
They were a necessary evil.
Whoops! I'm not being very politically correct here, am I? The official line is that they are wonderful in every way and anybody who has a problem, is obviously some sort of wimp.

The biggest (and smallest) problem is that one size does not fit all. So why on earth don't they make them in all shapes and sizes? It was only after years of cursing Durex, that I discovered that there were alternatives. So after trying a few, I discovered the Joy of the Trojan Ultra Pleasure.

I think I am right in saying, that to meet the British Standard, all UK condoms must be 52mm wide. Yes they do stretch, but so do bras, so why don't they make them all in size 36B. That's the average.

So all I had to do was import them from the States. And there were all sorts of others to try. Some were good and others less so, but it was fun and exciting to try.
Yes! Suddenly condoms were fun and sexy.

Rolled up comdom
Currently there is no reason for us to use condoms, but sometimes I see a new type and can't resist seeing how it feels. Damn it! They get better all the time.
And now I've just noticed that one company has actually started making condoms in 55 sizes. And it's the same company were I discovered the huge range, several years ago.

I wasn't going to put any commercial links on this site, but here's one, because they are doing important work: Condomania (the one in the USA)

A few words of advice:
Polyurethane Condoms : These are bigger than your average latex model. This is because the forces required to stretch them are enormous. If you are Mr. Average, then these condoms will probably suit you. If you are thin, they will fall off. If you are thick, you'll never get one on.

Natural Condoms : They're made from sheep innards. Which I could come to terms with, if they didn't smell of roast lamb. Maybe they should come with a mint sauce lubricant.

Plain ended condom on penisPlain Ended : Why don't they make more like that? I think it looks good. On condoms, the dangley bit isn't very esthetically pleasing, especially for oral sex.
(The rubber at the tip is loose, so there is room for the come.)

0 komentar: